EP9: Our Bodies, Our Fine A$$ Selves
In this episode (Part 1 of our 2-Part Season 1 Finale) we’re focusing on our connection to our physical body AKA our fine a$$ selves.
Our physical bodies are so deeply-tied to our emotional and mental state and it’s something that cannot, and should not, be ignored.
We start off the discussion looking at issues around weight and body image and our early experiences with self-loathing (gulp.) From there we talk about how empowering and stabilizing it can be work our physical selves with the goal of feeling strong and healthy rather than with the goal of being “skinny” or “thin” to meet external or societal expectations.
We extract the feelings of connection and relaxation as the noticeable signs of being in-tune with our bodies and we talk about when we feel, and have felt, the best in our skin. The conversation then turns to diets, fasting and talking about our eating habits. We then get into the practices that help us remain grateful and present in our bodies.
Erin unpacks some ideas around trauma and overcoming its legacy as it’s stored in the physical body and she then offers some great and simple ways to mitigate its negative effects.
We finish off the episode with some thoughts on aging and ways to teach kids body autonomy. For all this and more tune in to the Less Alone Podcast!
Key Points From This Episode:
- Society’s conditioning around weight and its link to self-worth
- Exercise routines and connecting to the body through athleticism and strength rather than with the goal of being “thin” or “skinny”
- Times when we feel best in our bodies; connected, relaxed and at peace
- Fasting, diets and rephrasing eating as a period of nourishment
- Times that we have felt the worst about our bodies; movement, our guts and boundaries.
- Loving our bodies through the amazing memories attached to it
- Trauma and the way the body stores and holds onto bad experiences
- Two exercises to bring us back “into body” through the power of breath and hands at the belly and heart
- How to teach body autonomy and ownership to kids
- The honor of aging, growing older, wiser and less hot
- This week’s awareness challenge for getting in touch with your body and self!
- And much more!
Links and Resources Mentioned in Episode 9:
- Anna’s Spending Fast Bootcamp
- Erin’s Garmin watch
- Denver Eating Disorder Recovery Program
- The Biggest Loser
- Mama June: From Not to Hot
- Honey Boo Boo
- Dana Suchow / @danasuchow
- Rachel Cargle / @rachelcargle
- Celeste Barber /@celestebarber
- Raw Beauty Talks
- Kate Middleton and Meghan Markle
- Heal documentary
- Louise Hay
- Heal Your Body
- Tara Brach and Tara Brach’s Podcast
- Feather Berkower’s website, Parenting Safe Children, her book: Off Limits: A Parents Guide to Keeping Children Safe From Sexual Abuse, and the Conversation Starter Cards
- Forks Over Knives documentary
Email us at Hello@LessAlonePodcast.com for a copy of the full transcript
P.S. Be sure to Rate, Review and Subscribe to the podcast in your favorite podcast player!
[0:00:01.5] AMY MOORE: We are three friends exploring connection. From the coffee shop to the podcast studio. I’m Amy.
[0:00:06.3] ANNA NEWELL JONES: I’m Anna.
[0:00:06.7] ERIN LINEHAN: I’m Erin.
[0:00:14.6] AMY MOORE: Hey, hey.
[0:00:15.1] ERIN LINEHAN: Heyo!
[0:00:16.1] ANNA NEWELL JONES: Hey.
[0:00:16.7] AMY MOORE: Hey, here we go.
[0:00:18.0] ERIN LINEHAN: Yup.
[0:00:18.9] AMY MOORE: Episode 9. Got to give you guys a warning, audience and Anna and Erin. No. The warning is there is a mention of eating disorders on this episode. If that’s a trigger for you, this is a heads up, so that you know from the get-go.
Because today, the conversation topic is — we’re actually doing a two-part series, so this is the first part. It is about the Connection to the Physical Body.
[0:00:51.8] ANNA NEWELL JONES: Yeah, so connection to ourselves. The first part is the connection to our physical body.
[0:00:57.0] AMY MOORE: Yes. Thank you, Anna.
[0:00:57.8] ANNA NEWELL JONES: It’s okay. Yeah. Teamwork.
[0:01:01.1] ERIN LINEHAN: Modified.
[0:01:02.1] AMY MOORE: Correction.
[0:01:04.4] ANNA NEWELL JONES: Correction corner happening on the spot.
[0:01:06.6] AMY MOORE: Yeah.
[0:01:07.9] ERIN LINEHAN: Well done.
[0:01:08.4] AMY MOORE: I like that.
[0:01:10.2] ANNA NEWELL JONES: Yeah. Then the next episode, our season finale, Part Two of Connection to ourselves, will be the connection to our higher selves, our purpose –
[0:01:19.3] AMY MOORE: Social, emotional, spiritual.
[0:01:21.5] ANNA NEWELL JONES: Yeah, not a big one at all.
[0:01:23.7] ERIN LINEHAN: Go big or go home.
[0:01:25.0] AMY MOORE: Wrap up the season in one short episode.
[0:01:27.8] ERIN LINEHAN: That’s right.
[0:01:29.5] ANNA NEWELL JONES: Yeah, so this is a big one.
[0:01:30.5] AMY MOORE: This is a big one. Connection to the Physical Body is what we’re focusing on today.
[0:01:35.0] ANNA NEWELL JONES: We like to keep things light around here.
[0:01:37.1] AMY MOORE: Oh, yeah.
[0:01:37.7] ANNA NEWELL JONES: Kidding. Kidding.
[0:01:40.5] AMY MOORE: So light. Before we get into it, I did just want to quick say, shout out for Spending –
[0:01:50.8] ANNA NEWELL JONES: Bootcamp.
[0:01:51.4] ERIN LINEHAN: Bootcamp. No, keep that.
[0:01:55.5] AMY MOORE: Okay. Okay, spendingfastbootcamp.com, which is created by our very own Anna.
Anna has helped her community get out of over 5 million dollars in debt.
[0:02:09.9] ERIN LINEHAN: That’s a lot of money.
[0:02:10.6] AMY MOORE: That’s amazing.
[0:02:13.1] ANNA NEWELL JONES: I do have to say that’s only since I’ve been keeping track, which has been a few years.
[0:02:16.0] AMY MOORE: That’s amazing.
[0:02:18.3] ANNA NEWELL JONES: It’s even more than that number.
[0:02:19.5] AMY MOORE: Wow. That community can help you too. If you go to our website, you’ll find a link in the show notes for 20% off at spendingfastbootcamp.com. Anna and her community can help you get out of debt as well.
[0:02:36.2] ANNA NEWELL JONES: Yeah, let’s do this.
[0:02:38.0] AMY MOORE: All right, and then let’s just follow up quick on our awareness nugget.
[0:02:44.4] ANNA NEWELL JONES: Awareness nugget.
[0:02:46.7] AMY MOORE: It was to turn off notifications.
[0:02:49.0] ANNA NEWELL JONES: Okay. It has morphed throughout the season of started with a challenge to do. Then it’s an awareness challenge. Then it was a dense nugget. Then we’re like, “Awareness nugget.”
[0:03:04.4] ERIN LINEHAN: Yeah, that’s right.
[0:03:05.6] ANNA NEWELL JONES: Evolution of our –
[0:03:07.2] ERIN LINEHAN: We’re figuring it out.
[0:03:08.5] ANNA NEWELL JONES: Awareness nuggets. Yeah.
[0:03:09.3] AMY MOORE: Slowly, but surely. Either way, it was to turn off notifications. Erin, how’d you do?
[0:03:15.0] ERIN LINEHAN: Well, my notifications are already off for the majority.
[0:03:18.4] AMY MOORE: Cheater.
[0:03:20.5] ERIN LINEHAN: That’s not cheating.
[0:03:21.3] ANNA NEWELL JONES: Mine were off too.
[0:03:23.8] AMY MOORE: Oh, man.
[0:03:24.2] ERIN LINEHAN: Slacker.
[0:03:24.8] AMY MOORE: Was I the only one?
[0:03:26.4] ERIN LINEHAN: Slacker. Yes.
[0:03:27.4] ANNA NEWELL JONES: Were you?
[0:03:28.2] AMY MOORE: I guess so.
[0:03:29.1] ERIN LINEHAN: I do keep my Garmin notifications on and I do keep my Headspace. All social media, all other things, and my spending on my bank, so I like that. I did do – have you ever been to the Levitt Pavilion ?
[0:03:41.6] AMY MOORE: No.
[0:03:51.4] AMY MOORE: What?
[0:03:52.6] ERIN LINEHAN: It’s great. Of all sorts of different types of music. We went there. Our friend picked us up. We usually ride our bikes, but she doesn’t live close. She came and picked us up and then we went and I left my phone at home. I didn’t even miss it.
[0:04:04.4] AMY MOORE: The best night ever.
[0:04:05.5] ERIN LINEHAN: It’s great.
[0:04:06.3] AMY MOORE: Yeah, so nice.
[0:04:07.1] ERIN LINEHAN: I don’t even think about it, and then it didn’t even matter that I didn’t have it.
[0:04:11.5] ANNA NEWELL JONES: It has a pull on you when – I noticed for myself, it has a pull when it’s around.
[0:04:16.3] AMY MOORE: Well, and specifically with those notifications.
[0:04:18.2] ANNA NEWELL JONES: Oh, yeah.
[0:04:18.7] AMY MOORE: You hear a ding or whatever. I got to say, I did the challenge. I turned off all the notifications, except for text, WhatsApp, photos, because I love seeing people post photos in my family shares.
[0:04:32.9] ERIN LINEHAN: I don’t even know you could have a notification for that.
[0:04:35.6] ANNA NEWELL JONES: Wait, what is it? A shared album?
[0:04:37.2] AMY MOORE: Yeah. Google shared albums and Apple iPhoto shared albums. You get a little pop up when someone posts.
[0:04:43.7] ANNA NEWELL JONES: I see.
[0:04:44.5] AMY MOORE: Yup. Love those things. I like it so far. Yeah, so far, so good. I’m definitely going to stick with it.
[0:04:49.8] ERIN LINEHAN: A lot less noise with all the things.
[0:04:52.8] AMY MOORE: Well, and I think about that distraction thing that we talked about last episode. That’s really helpful. Anyway, we’d love to know how all of you did. How did you do? Let us know.
[0:05:01.9] ERIN LINEHAN: Anna, how do you do?
[0:05:03.4] ANNA NEWELL JONES: Oh, I had my notifications turned off already.
[0:05:05.6] AMY MOORE: She’s there’s another cheater.
[0:05:06.5] ERIN LINEHAN: That’s right.
[0:05:07.4] ANNA NEWELL JONES: It’s not cheater.
[0:05:08.1] ERIN LINEHAN: Maybe you’re a slacker.
[0:05:09.3] ANNA NEWELL JONES: This is an awareness nugget. Meaning, it’s not necessarily a challenge, right?
[0:05:15.0] AMY MOORE: True.
[0:05:16.6] ANNA NEWELL JONES: I guess, putting the other part of the challenge or awareness nugget is something to be aware of, right? Was to put the phone away. I’ve really worked on doing that when I’m at home and trying to be totally focused on what I’m doing in the moment, rather than being like, “Oh, my phone gets to have a say in what I’m doing right now, or I’m going to be distracted.” It’s like, “No, I’m going to work on being present right here, right now.” It’s going good. Not perfect, but any new things have bumps in the road, right?
[0:05:46.4] ERIN LINEHAN: Yeah.
[0:05:47.2] AMY MOORE: Totally. Can’t be perfect right out of the gate.
[0:05:49.5] ERIN LINEHAN: No.
[0:05:50.6] ANNA NEWELL JONES: We can try. We can try.
[0:05:53.7] ERIN LINEHAN: We can. We can.
[0:05:54.9] ANNA NEWELL JONES: And fail miserably.
[0:05:57.0] AMY MOORE: True. Guess what? According to this review that we have, we are not failing miserably.
[0:06:03.5] ERIN LINEHAN: Wow. That’s a good transition.
[0:06:04.7] AMY MOORE: You like that?
[0:06:06.1] ANNA NEWELL JONES: Yeah. Wow.
[0:06:08.2] AMY MOORE: The good news, we’ve got another great review. Thank you so much Luvtorrie. Thank you. Title is “A fun podcast.” Five stars. It says, “This podcast is like having coffee with your best friends. The ladies have great chemistry and the podcast feels very natural. It’s witty, creative and fun.” Thanks, Luvtorrie.
[0:06:33.2] ANNA NEWELL JONES: Thank you.
[0:06:33.3] ERIN LINEHAN: Thank you.
[0:06:34.4] AMY MOORE: Love that.
[0:06:34.8] ANNA NEWELL JONES: It’s so awesome.
[0:06:35.3] AMY MOORE: Yup. Keep them coming. Yeah.
All right, so we’re diving in ladies. We’re getting into the first part of our two-part program. Just kidding. Of our two-part podcast about connection to ourselves. We’re going to kick it off here with Anna.
[0:07:00.6] ANNA NEWELL JONES:Oh, gosh. Do it. What?
[0:07:00.8] AMY MOORE: Anna, tell us.
[0:07:01.9] ERIN LINEHAN: Hot potato every day. Here we go.
[0:07:06.6] AMY MOORE: Oh, shit. What do you think? What’s your connection to your body?
[0:07:11.2] ANNA NEWELL JONES: Oh, gosh. Not a big open-ended question at all. Oh, gosh. It’s tumultuous. It is a tough one.
[0:07:19.7] AMY MOORE: Yeah. You’re not alone.
[0:07:20.6] ERIN LINEHAN: Tumultuous how?
[0:07:22.7] ANNA NEWELL JONES: Oh, gosh. Right now, I feel I have a perpetual 20 pounds that I’m always trying to lose. Then when I do lose it, it’s like, “Whoa, life is great and I’m happy to be in photos and all this stuff.” When I have it, like so much of my how I see myself is wrapped up in my weight. I think that is so effed up and I don’t like it, but it’s the way it is. I remember –
[0:07:48.3] ERIN LINEHAN: I think for a lot of people. A lot of women especially.
[0:07:51.4] ANNA NEWELL JONES: Oh, yeah. It’s like, life is good when my weight is where I want it to be.
[0:07:54.3] AMY MOORE: Men too, I got to say.
[0:07:56.1] ERIN LINEHAN: Yeah, yeah, yeah.
[0:07:56.3] ANNA NEWELL JONES: I’m actually very surprised by –
[0:07:57.7] AMY MOORE: Me too.
[0:07:58.9] ANNA NEWELL JONES: – when I realized what a big issue it is for men as well. It’s something I think that speaks to how our society relates to weight in general. It’s been something I’ve struggled with, honestly since I was a really young kid. Gosh.
[0:08:16.1] AMY MOORE: Yeah, it’s intense.
[0:08:16.8] ANNA NEWELL JONES: It’s a lot. Yeah, what about you two?
[0:08:19.4] AMY MOORE: Same. I would say mine, similar. Just the ups and downs, rollercoaster. The grass is always greener if I weighed less. I’ve never been happy with my weighing more, or okay with it, I guess. It’s always in the back. It’s a nagger in the back, nagging little voice in my head or whatever. It definitely have had phases of unhealthy behaviors, or tried so many diets, all that stuff. I do think there are some things, times of my life where like, “Oh, I was eating all plant-based.” It wasn’t necessarily a diet, a way of eating that was really good.
[0:09:01.3] ANNA NEWELL JONES: It’s a lifestyle change.
[0:09:03.0] AMY MOORE: Yeah, but it felt so good.
[0:09:04.1] ERIN LINEHAN: It feels good.
[0:09:06.2] AMY MOORE: I like knowing that there are some of those basics, or some things I can go back to, without having to dive into a whole new diet, because I feel like the amount of freaking money that goes into those diets, it’s crazy.
[0:09:18.8] ERIN LINEHAN: Anna, what did you say the statistic was? On money spent on diets a year?
[0:09:22.0] AMY MOORE: Industry size.
[0:09:23.3] ANNA NEWELL JONES: Last I heard was 66 billion dollar dieting industry.
[0:09:27.4] AMY MOORE: That’s insane.
[0:09:28.2] ERIN LINEHAN: Mind-blowing.
[0:09:29.0] ANNA NEWELL JONES: It’s crazy.
[0:09:30.0] ERIN LINEHAN: It’s not surprising.
[0:09:31.3] AMY MOORE: No.
[0:09:31.9] ANNA NEWELL JONES: Not surprising at all. It’s such a thing. We just accept that.
[0:09:36.2] AMY MOORE: I feel like it’s a thing on both spectrums, like the dieting is huge and then the obesity epidemic is huge.
[0:09:43.6] ANNA NEWELL JONES: Something we’re doing is not working. Then everybody has this discontent with their body. It’s just – or a lot of people do.
[0:09:51.4] AMY MOORE: Yeah. What about you, Erin?
[0:09:52.2] ERIN LINEHAN: I think it’s the same. I think growing up, especially I know I talked about this on one of the recent episodes. It’s like, when I was this size in 6th grade, right? When you were the biggest kid in the class and you’re a girl, that was a hard thing to wrap my head around.
Then middle school, I was chunky, even though that – not kind of. I was. It was just hard. Then in terms of what is valued with women in society, right, if you are thin and you are little and petite, that’s what the “ideal woman” is. I had to do a shit ton of work that I’m not in that category.
I’m really strong and I feel really good about that. I’ve had to do my own work about like, how do I feel best in my body. When I am working out and eating well, like if my body feels bad, really my mood and how my body feels is very, very correlated.
[0:10:45.4] ANNA NEWELL JONES: Yeah, same here.
[0:10:46.6] ERIN LINEHAN: I had the work that I’ve had to do around really appreciating is a lot of work around gratitude. It’s like, my legs can run my ass up a mountain, and so the fact that I can do that and I’m able to do that, gives me a lot of gratitude and it just feels good. Sure, do I have an extra 10 to 15 pounds on me right now? Yes, but I can still run my ass up a mountain. I have to learn to how to appreciate that in me, and then that energy absolutely radiates outward.
I think that it’s along the same lines. I think there’s work to do around it, because there’s so much pressure in society around about what that should be and you should be this way, or that way when really – for so long, Barbie was the doll –
[0:11:31.0] AMY MOORE: Body image.
[0:11:31.9] ERIN LINEHAN: Yeah, the body – you’re supposed to look like Barbie. Barbie would be a 112 pounds. She would be grossly underweight. Her feet would be size 3 and she would fall over, because she wouldn’t be able to support herself. This is this image that we’ve been fed for a long time about this is what we’re supposed to look like in all sorts of aspects. Yes.
[0:11:52.7] AMY MOORE: Yes, totally.
[0:11:54.1] ERIN LINEHAN: It is a deeper issue. Yes.
[0:11:56.8] ANNA NEWELL JONES: Barbie. It’s all on you.
[0:11:59.1] ERIN LINEHAN: It’s all about Barbie, Anna.
[0:12:00.3] AMY MOORE: Anna, did you play with Barbie?
[0:12:02.1] ANNA NEWELL JONES: Not really. I always was like, “Uh, I’m bored.”
[0:12:05.3] AMY MOORE: My mom didn’t allow us to have Barbie.
[0:12:06.1] ERIN LINEHAN: Really?
[0:12:06.6] AMY MOORE: Yeah.
[0:12:07.2] ERIN LINEHAN: I went through a massive Barbie stage.
[0:12:08.8] AMY MOORE: Did you?
[0:12:09.7] ERIN LINEHAN: It’s a shocker.
[0:12:13.2] ANNA NEWELL JONES: Why didn’t she let you have Barbies?
[0:12:14.8] AMY MOORE: I’m not exactly sure why. Just couldn’t have Barbie. Wasn’t into it. What’s your experience with your body?
[0:12:22.0] ANNA NEWELL JONES: Oh, gosh.
[0:12:22.8] AMY MOORE: Love it? Hate it? Kind of a tricky –
[0:12:25.9] ANNA NEWELL JONES: Oh, that’s just all the things.
[0:12:28.0] AMY MOORE: It really is.
[0:12:28.4] ANNA NEWELL JONES: It really brings up a lot for me. I remember talking about childhood experience with our body and stuff and the connection. I noticed when I first started disliking my body. I remember that.
It was when I got this little fat on the side of my knee when I wouldn’t bend my leg. I was on the back of a bike and we were riding, doing whatever we were doing as kids. Someone told me, whoever was driving the bike said, “Get off. You’re too fat.” I was like, “Oh!” That was like, “All right, I got to do something about this.”
[0:13:04.6] AMY MOORE: Defining moment.
[0:13:05.3] ANNA NEWELL JONES: Yeah. I remember I watched some Hallmark type of movie and the girl was anorexic. I was like, “That sounds like a really good idea.” From middle school on, I dealt with anorexia and then bulimia. It’s hard to talk about this right now.
[0:13:23.6] ERIN LINEHAN: You’re doing a great job.
[0:13:25.4] ANNA NEWELL JONES: I didn’t end up getting my period, because I was so underweight until what? 9th or 10th grade. I mean, I feel there’s always been things that have taken priority, as far as like, “Oh, this is a bigger problem than this other.”
[0:13:40.9] AMY MOORE: Nourishing.
[0:13:41.9] ANNA NEWELL JONES: Yeah. I haven’t ever really dealt with it with a professional, which would probably be a really good idea, because I constantly have body issues of my worth being so tied to how much I weigh. When I see people, particularly people who used to be dancers or something, or even yoga people, they have a way that they are in their bodies that is really cool.
Not just the grace part, but the way that they own their body. There’s someone else that I’m thinking of and he comes in and just sits down and just sprawls out and it’s just like, “Oh, you’re really comfortable with your body, in a way.” It’s just taking up space in a certain way. There’s a lot. It’s complicated. #complicated.
[0:14:27.3] AMY MOORE: That’s super brave of you for just sharing.
[0:14:29.7] ANNA NEWELL JONES: Yeah. I mean, it’s something. I feel it’s haunted me. It’s been a shadow in a way.
[0:14:34.5] AMY MOORE: Did you say that those behaviors stopped after middle school, or stopped in high school?
[0:14:41.0] ANNA NEWELL JONES: It lasted up until my 20s, for sure. It fizzled out. We must live near an eating disorder clinic, because they always see primarily girls walking around that are severely underweight.
There’s one in particular that used to live in the same building as us and it’s just like, “Oh, dear God please be with her.” She’s still alive. I see her and I think, “Thank, God. She’s still alive.” I can’t help but think about my own stuff when I see her, or the other girls.
[0:15:11.4] AMY MOORE: Denver actually has a really good eating disorder recovery program. I’ll look it up. We’ll get it. Yeah.
[0:15:18.9] ANNA NEWELL JONES: My old neighbor, another old neighbor in our new place, she actually worked for one of them, like an outpatient. It was really interesting. For the longest time, every time I would travel, I would take the little travel-size things; shampoos and conditioners and then donate them to the eating disorder clinic, because she said that they really appreciated that.
Yeah. Okay, next topic. Or what’s the question for you two?
[0:15:42.9] AMY MOORE: I would say okay, so for me, I was super active as a kid and lots of sports. Weight wasn’t a thing, I would say, until probably high school. Then the awareness came in around body shape and body size, I would say. I feel it’s just so common, but just the desire to be thin. Then as I’ve gotten older, I’ve always seen myself more as a strong, or athletic type body build, rather than a thin type of person.
I have had better years than others in accepting that and loving that part of me. I did CrossFit for a while and I loved it, because I just felt it was such a great way to express the strength that I have physically. That was really fun. Then I think, running races. I do enjoy more a 5K race than I would a long-distance race in general, because I think sometimes I have a little bit more of a sprinter body, but not that I’m sprinting all the time by any means, especially in a 5K race.
I think if I am able to focus on my athleticism, then I love my body more and I can find way more gratitude for it. That requires me to continue to move and continue to exercise. I wish I was more disciplined in exercising every single day. I don’t exercise every single day.
[0:17:16.5] ANNA NEWELL JONES: I used to.
[0:17:17.9] AMY MOORE: Did you?
[0:17:17.9] ANNA NEWELL JONES: Mm-hmm.
[0:17:18.9] AMY MOORE: Yeah. I mean, I walk my dog. Yeah, I think food stuff for me, it’s just such a rollercoaster. Like I already said, the diet’s up and down and I can binge on sugar and that’s a big thing. I feel I’ve tried them all.
I’ve seen some nutritionists in the past. One nutritionist, she was like, “Well, balance is the most important thing.” I kinda wanted to be like, “Duh. I know that and if I could do that, then I wouldn’t be sitting here in this office.”
[0:17:51.5] ANNA NEWELL JONES: Balance is –
[0:17:53.2] AMY MOORE: Yes.
[0:17:53.6] ANNA NEWELL JONES: So hard.
[0:17:53.9] ERIN LINEHAN: Balance is bullshit sometimes.
[0:17:55.0] AMY MOORE: I know.
[0:17:56.0] ERIN LINEHAN: It’s total bullshit.
[0:17:56.2] AMY MOORE: It just was not helpful.
[0:17:58.1] ANNA NEWELL JONES: It’s like, “Oh, really.”
[0:17:59.4] AMY MOORE: Yeah, yeah, yeah. I feel like there are programs out there for everything. Also to help people with food.
[0:18:07.9] ANNA NEWELL JONES: Yeah. I’ve heard of a food therapist specific for food. I mean, I’m sure Erin, you must deal with food issues and your practices.
[0:18:16.4] ERIN LINEHAN: Sure. If people have disordered eating that’s out of my scope, then that is something that I refer on, because that’s not my specialty.
[0:18:23.4] AMY MOORE: I would imagine that is a specialty.
[0:18:25.5] ERIN LINEHAN: Yeah, absolutely. Yeah.
[0:18:27.1] AMY MOORE: Yeah, so that’s where I’m at. What about you, Erin?
[0:18:29.0] ERIN LINEHAN: I feel some more things around being if I value my athletic body and what I can do with it, then I feel great a lot. Sometimes, I feel my – I go at about 110 miles an hour all the time. I wish that I had more discipline around giving my body rest when it needs it, because I just keep on pushing through and drinking quad espressos. I’m not always –
[0:18:54.6] AMY MOORE: And Monster drinks.
[0:18:56.0] ERIN LINEHAN: That was rare. That was yesterday, yeah, that I don’t like to do it, but that is an indication of, “Uh, you’re on empty.”
[0:19:03.6] AMY MOORE: Understandably, you’ve had a lot going on.
[0:19:05.3] ERIN LINEHAN: Yeah. My body will just shut down. When I had the Monster drink yesterday and then I got home and we had dinner and then I felt terrible. Then I had horrible pangs in my stomach.
Not that I need to get into that, but then I did not go on my run and I slept in this morning, then I just hung out in the morning. That’s not something that I do very often. I just need to be gentle in that way, but it’s hard for me, because I just want to get things and be in full experience.
The point of the question is where’s my experience with my body? I think that it’s all over the place.
[0:19:41.3] AMY MOORE: Yeah. I mean, I wonder how many people would be – I mean, that’s got to be the majority, right? Everyone, the ups and downs and the – I mean, this isn’t –
[0:19:50.6] ERIN LINEHAN: If I can be fully in my body, like very present and here, the experience in the world for me is so vibrant.
[0:19:59.9] AMY MOORE: One of our question says, “When do you feel the best about your body?” It sounds like you’re getting there. Say more about that. What does that mean?
[0:20:07.5] ERIN LINEHAN: When I can feel grounded and centered and whenever I haven’t – my husband talks about whenever – he said something. I was real antsy, because I hadn’t worked out in a while and he’s like, “You’re like a caged dog whenever you don’t work out,” because I just can’t sit for that long.
I feel best in my body when I have moved enough and then I’m eating – I eat mostly a plant-based diet now, just because that’s what works with me. When I am eating in that way and really taking care of myself, then that’s when I feel best.
Being in my body and me taking care of myself and not in an obsessive way, but just comfortable in my own skin and what brings me to comfort in my own skin is in varying degrees, on the day, I think. I think, feeling not comfortable in my own skin is when I’m like, “Oh, I don’t want to be with me.” Then you’re stuck with yourself. That’s when I do not –
[0:21:02.8] ANNA NEWELL JONES: Here I am.
[0:21:03.6] AMY MOORE: Here I am again. You again. Great.
[0:21:09.2] ANNA NEWELL JONES: Can’t shake you.
[0:21:12.0] ERIN LINEHAN: That’s not my favorite thing. When do I feel best in my body? I think I got that answered.
[0:21:17.6] AMY MOORE: Yeah.
[0:21:18.3] ANNA NEWELL JONES: I think I felt best in my body when I was vegan actually. My weight wasn’t an issue. It wasn’t something I struggled with, or thought too much about. The worst I felt about my body was when I did – talk about fad diets and trends and stuff was when I did a fast of water, cayenne, pepper, honey, lemon one.
[0:21:39.3] AMY MOORE: I know that one.
[0:21:39.8] ANNA NEWELL JONES: Have you done it?
[0:21:40.5] AMY MOORE: Yeah. Yeah.
[0:21:41.9] ANNA NEWELL JONES: Have you done it?
[0:21:42.5] AMY MOORE: I only did it for a day, or it was 48 hours maybe. Just a cleanse.
[0:21:45.9] ANNA NEWELL JONES: I did it for – Oh, no. I tried to do it for five days. It was so bad.
[0:21:50.6] ERIN LINEHAN: Because they talk about with cleanses – I don’t know about that, but with cleanses when in your body is detoxing, all of that crap out. My sister was telling about some dude that did a water fast and he still had bowel movements after two weeks, because our bodies carry so much stuff.
[0:22:06.8] AMY MOORE: There’s so much crap in our food. I mean, that’s the other thing that I think this could be a whole other – it could be a whole other season, right, is the American food industry.
[0:22:16.4] ANNA NEWELL JONES: Oh, for sure. Yeah, so it was – that fast was so bad that two crazy things happened. The night before the second experience, I was at Target and I must have been looking so rough that there was an undercover cop following my ass around. I was like, “Why is this person following me around?”
I was like, “Holy shit. I must look like I’m on drugs or something.” In the next day, I was taking a bus to work and I started feeling super, super nauseous. I go to stand up, I barfed all this water all over on the bus.
[0:22:51.8] ERIN LINEHAN: Someone? Did you barf on someone?
[0:22:54.6] ANNA NEWELL JONES: Not on anybody, but it was just –
[0:22:56.9] AMY MOORE: In the aisle or something?
[0:22:58.1] ERIN LINEHAN: They’re like, “Oh.”
[0:22:58.9] ANNA NEWELL JONES: I’m like, “This is not going well at all.” I was like, “I’m so sorry.” It was so bad. I called in and I’m like, “Shit, I got to go get a hamburger or something.”
[0:23:13.0] AMY MOORE: Yeah. That is just not good.
[0:23:18.5] ANNA NEWELL JONES: I don’t recommend that one. It was not a success story. Yeah, I felt really bad about that one.
[0:23:27.0] ERIN LINEHAN: Check out and vomit. Here we go.
[0:23:30.3] AMY MOORE: Oh, my gosh. This is making me think of something a little off-topic, but in our first episode, I talked about that Bar3 retreat that I went to. One thing that I really loved about that is that whenever – we had an itinerary of the weekend. Whenever there was a meal it said, ‘nourishment’.
The whole thing was all about nourishing and nourishment and the food was very healthy. Sometimes I’d like to think about that word, rather than eating, or feeding. It’s just like, “Oh, how do I need to nourish myself?”
[0:24:08.1] ANNA NEWELL JONES: It’s a good idea.
[0:24:09.2] AMY MOORE: Nourish my body.
[0:24:09.9] ANNA NEWELL JONES: Just to reframe it. Be like, “Let’s really nourish the body here.”
[0:24:15.2] AMY MOORE: I’m really hungry. What do I need to nourish?
[0:24:18.0] ANNA NEWELL JONES: I want to start using that language with Henry. “All right, it’s time to nourish. Nourish time.”
[0:24:26.0] AMY MOORE: It’s good though. I think it’s a shift.
[0:24:28.0] ANNA NEWELL JONES: Especially since there is so much distortion around food, just constantly, nonstop.
[0:24:35.2] AMY MOORE: Well, I think too for so often, I either think, good, bad. All this food is labeled in my head. “It’s good, it’s bad. Yes, I can. No, I can’t.” Then if I just think about what do I need to nourish myself?
[0:24:47.0] ERIN LINEHAN: If you intuitively listen to what you need and then you listen to that, that’s a –
[0:24:51.7] AMY MOORE: Powerful.
[0:24:52.4] ERIN LINEHAN: Yes. You can feel it.
[0:24:55.9] AMY MOORE: When do we feel the worst about our bodies?
[0:24:57.7] ERIN LINEHAN: When I am not eating how I know that nourishes me, that and if I haven’t moved, then I just feel bloated and gross. Like I always said before, how I feel in my body is reflective of my mood and then my outlook and my perception on things. Yeah.
[0:25:14.3] AMY MOORE: Well, and how about all the connections between gut and mental health? There’s so much new information coming out with just the gut health and how the effect of that in the entire body, but especially mental and emotional health and just how important it is. Anna, you added something about your sister with the –
[0:25:33.2] ANNA NEWELL JONES: Boundaries.
[0:25:33.9] AMY MOORE: Yeah, or something. There’s something.
[0:25:35.8] ANNA NEWELL JONES: Yeah. It’s interesting. My little sister who have I find that I’m mentioning quite a lot on this podcast, she started noticing that — we all live – me and my other sisters, there’s three total.
She started noticing — and my mom, that when we would get together after being away from each other for a little while, one of the first things we would say is, “Do I look fat?” Privately like, “What do you think? Did I gain weight? Do I look fat?” It was one of the first things that we said to each other. She said, “I’m not doing that anymore. We’re not doing it anymore.”
[0:26:09.3] AMY MOORE: Good for her. That’s great.
[0:26:11.2] ANNA NEWELL JONES: We stopped doing it. It was like, “Okay.”
[0:26:13.9] ERIN LINEHAN: Did you ever tell each other that you did look fat?
[0:26:16.2] ANNA NEWELL JONES: Me and my twin sister. Oh, yeah. We would totally tell each other. “Well, you look like you gained.”
[0:26:23.4] AMY MOORE: You’d be honest.
[0:26:26.9] ANNA NEWELL JONES: We would totally.
[0:26:27.7] AMY MOORE: A good boundary. I wish I have –
[0:26:28.9] ANNA NEWELL JONES: Yeah, it was little sister.
[0:26:30.2] AMY MOORE: Before we switch to a little bit more positivity, there was something, Erin, that you had mentioned about when people are in that mindset of changing something about their body, and then it’s like, they did it, they successfully changed something and then what’s left? There was something that you were –
[0:26:49.0] ERIN LINEHAN: I was talking about how when I see people that have a lot of trauma, right? Will say, “I don’t know what to do with myself when I don’t have to carry this around anymore. Who am I without this?” I think that can go into –
[0:27:05.6] ANNA NEWELL JONES: It’s such a part of the identity.
[0:27:07.1] ERIN LINEHAN: Yes, yes. For the stuff that I’ve worked through, it’s this thing that comes up in people that’s like, “Uh, I don’t know what to do.”
[0:27:15.2] ANNA NEWELL JONES: Now what?
[0:27:16.8] ERIN LINEHAN: Yes. Now what and then who am I? If I’m not whatever, then I don’t know who I am in the world, or I don’t know how to function.
[0:27:23.5] AMY MOORE: How would you tie it to the body?
[0:27:25.0] ERIN LINEHAN: The body stuff is I think a lot of time, if you look at that show, The Biggest Loser, right? There’s a lot of people that lose a large amount of weight. Then because they don’t have the structure and other things, but because I think a lot of people don’t deal with the inside thing, what is driving, that level of obesity, right?
Then I think it’s easy to gain weight back. I think that with all body stuff, like Anna, you were talking about with the eating disordered stuff, if you don’t actually deal with the underlying issue of what it’s like driving that behavior, or what is the wound, right? Then we just keep on doing this thing. Or if we don’t get in touch with –
[0:28:00.3] ANNA NEWELL JONES: It manifests in other ways.
[0:28:02.6] ERIN LINEHAN: Yes. Or you’re just perpetually in the hamster wheel on this cycle of dieting, or –
[0:28:07.4] AMY MOORE: Some addiction of some sort.
[0:28:09.0] ERIN LINEHAN: Well, just think about how much time that we all spend probably thinking about, “Uh, I don’t look good in this. Oh, I don’t like this.” Whatever how much time all of us spend in our heads thinking about that, which is when there’s freedom from that, I think there’s a lot of freedom, but that’s a separate thing. I just think that –
[0:28:25.1] AMY MOORE: You have to refill that space.
[0:28:26.8] ERIN LINEHAN: Yes. You have to do the work, so that you’re not trying to fill it up with something else, whether that’s with booze, or with –
[0:28:33.7] ANNA NEWELL JONES: Shopping.
[0:28:34.4] ERIN LINEHAN: Shopping, or spending, or whatever the fucking thing.
[0:28:40.6] ANNA NEWELL JONES: Yeah. Oh, boy. Gosh, it’s getting a little serious.
[0:28:42.5] ERIN LINEHAN: Okay. That’s all right.
[0:28:43.7] ANNA NEWELL JONES: You can always throw in some D bill a little light.
[0:28:47.3] ERIN LINEHAN: Live it a little light.
[0:28:48.5] ANNA NEWELL JONES: With this group.
[0:28:49.1] ERIN LINEHAN: I’ll probably keep her around.
[0:28:52.2] AMY MOORE: Oh, boy.
[0:28:52.5] ANNA NEWELL JONES: Yeah. People will have these huge changes in their life, right? With their bodies, the gastric sleeve is a perfect example, the gastric bypass. I’ve been watching, this is such a guilty pleasure show. Mama June: From Not to Hot, Honey Boo Boo’s mom? Anybody else watches on Hulu?
[0:29:12.4] ERIN LINEHAN: No, I got nothing.
[0:29:13.3] ANNA NEWELL JONES: Nothing?
[0:29:14.0] ERIN LINEHAN: No. Called truly of Honey Boo Boo, but that’s all I know.
[0:29:16.6] ANNA NEWELL JONES: Her mom has this show Mama June: From Not to Hot. She had this gastric sleeve surgery and she is doing all these things to self-sabotage. It’s really interesting. She’s gaining the weight back, because she hasn’t dealt with the underlying issue. Totally the same thing that you were just talking about.
[0:29:36.2] ERIN LINEHAN: Honey Boo Boo. Ring a bell. Pop culture wiz.
[0:29:40.6] ANNA NEWELL JONES: I was just thinking when I was watching it last night, actually I was like, her agent will call her. Gina will call her and be like, “Junior, eating again.” Then Mama June is like, “Stop nagging me.” I’m like, “You know what this agent needs to do is get a psychologist for Mama June.” That would serious keep her – help her the most, rather than nagging. Nagging doesn’t do shit.
[0:30:05.6] ERIN LINEHAN: Was it good television though.
[0:30:08.1] AMY MOORE: Oh, my goodness.
[0:30:09.2] ANNA NEWELL JONES: This is true.
[0:30:09.6] AMY MOORE: Anna, you know how to solve Mama June’s problems.
[0:30:13.9] ERIN LINEHAN: Thank goodness.
[0:30:14.9] ANNA NEWELL JONES: Just a little idea.
[0:30:16.0] ERIN LINEHAN: Send her a direct message. Yeah. “How about therapy, Mama June? We talked about you on our podcast.”
[0:30:22.4] ANNA NEWELL JONES: I’m sure that would be really well received by anybody. There are a lots of people who love hearing, “Therapy might be helpful.”
[0:30:33.4] AMY MOORE: That is hilarious. Well, speaking of –
[0:30:37.3] ERIN LINEHAN: How do we transition out of it, Amy?
[0:30:38.6] AMY MOORE: Speaking of pop culture, there was an Instagram post on loving your body.
[0:30:44.5] ANNA NEWELL JONES: Yeah, so there’s actually a lady. Her name is Dana Suchow, and she I actually found out about her – because I follow Rachel Cargle, who was also wonderful. This lady Dana Suchow has this wonderful body positivity stuff and she has one post in particular that I think is wonderful.
[0:31:03.1] AMY MOORE: It says, “Love your body. Look at your hands. They have pet so many cute animals and dried so many of your tears. Look at your feet, they have walked you to some of your favorite places and walked you away from the bad ones. Look at your belly, think of the days when it’s been full and warm with your favorite foods.”
Look at your legs, they have held you up when you thought you weren’t strong enough to stand. Look at your eyes, they have seen so many beautiful people. Look at your mouth, it has told so many people that you love them. Your body has been there for you since day one. Love it. It loves you.”
[0:31:38.8] ERIN LINEHAN: It’s good. It’s really good.
[0:31:39.8] AMY MOORE: Thank you, Dana.
[0:31:40.8] ANNA NEWELL JONES: Really good.
[0:31:42.0] AMY MOORE: Erin, you do a lot of your work about getting into the body and why that matters, or why –
[0:31:48.6] ANNA NEWELL JONES: Wait, wait, wait. Before we move on, there is that.
[0:31:51.6] AMY MOORE: Okay.
[0:31:51.5] ANNA NEWELL JONES: You had another one from Instagram. Celeste Barber.
[0:31:55.7] AMY MOORE: Oh, God. Yes. Love her. She’s just hilarious.
[0:31:59.0] ANNA NEWELL JONES: Okay, but why do you like her and how –
[0:32:01.8] AMY MOORE: Because she’s real. Because she does these hilarious posts.
[0:32:05.7] ANNA NEWELL JONES: She’s got a real body.
[0:32:07.2] AMY MOORE: Yeah. She’s a real woman. She’ll imitate some pose, or something that maybe a model is doing, or someone who’s amazing looking, or amazingly dressed, or whatever. Then she does it just as a regular woman. It is awesome.
[0:32:28.3] ANNA NEWELL JONES: It’s so funny.
[0:32:29.3] AMY MOORE: I just feel –
[0:32:30.0] ANNA NEWELL JONES: Celeste Barber?
[0:32:31.1] AMY MOORE: Yeah, I think so.
[0:32:31.5] ANNA NEWELL JONES: You know what? That totally reminds me of when the summer Olympics were going on last, there was this meme going around about — let’s have the Olympians do it and then have a regular –
[0:32:42.5] AMY MOORE: Yes, exactly.
[0:32:43.3] ANNA NEWELL JONES: – normal – non-Olympian do it, as just a reality marker of like, this is how amazingly talented this Olympian is right now.
I think it’s so easy to see these feats that these Olympians are doing and be like, yeah, clearly they make it look so easy. If a regular – if I were to be out there just like, “Yeah, let’s do this little run.”
[0:33:09.3] AMY MOORE: Yeah. No, so Celeste Barber is an actor, comedian, writer and a lady. I’m telling you, she’s hilarious.
[0:33:15.4] ANNA NEWELL JONES: She’s so funny.
[0:33:15.6] AMY MOORE: I love it, because she’s real. It’s like Raw Beauty Talks, do you know that one too?
[0:33:20.5] ANNA NEWELL JONES: Mm-mm.
[0:33:20.9] AMY MOORE: Yeah, Raw Beauty Talks. It shows people real. Some people will go on there with no makeup, some people will go on there who maybe have different pigmentation in their skin and they – people will show just pictures of the real body. There’s really uplifting, wonderful posts on there that — mostly geared towards women.
[0:33:43.2] ANNA NEWELL JONES: It also makes me think about Kate Middleton and Meghan Markle, just most recently obviously with baby Archie. Showing their postpartum bodies and there’s so much pressure on women right after birth to be like, “Oh, snap back.
Let’s see how fast you can get back to your pre-maternity weight and all this, pre-pregnancy weight and all of this.” I just think it’s really nice when celebrities and people in the public eye are real about their bodies in their situation.
[0:34:13.0] AMY MOORE: Yeah, just be real, or show it. You don’t have to be it all the time, obviously if you’re in the public eye all the time. Nice to see that side, right? Now are we ready to go?
[0:34:23.3] ANNA NEWELL JONES: Yes, yes, yes.
[0:34:26.4] AMY MOORE: Okay. All right.
[0:34:27.8] ANNA NEWELL JONES: I’m like, “Wait a minute. We don’t know it’s here from the outliers –”
[0:34:32.2] AMY MOORE: Erin, back to you. You work a lot with people and the importance of what it means to get into your body. Why does that matter and what does that mean? Why don’t you just take it away?
[0:34:46.7] ERIN LINEHAN: It matters. I do a lot of trauma work. Trauma just being defined as something that has happened that stays with you. A very simple definition. We could get more complex, but we’re not going to. When that happens, oftentimes our nervous systems get overwhelmed, and so we check out of our bodies, because it’s a war zone, or it’s too painful to be in there.
Then depending on life, because we get so bombarded by the world, then it’s hard to be in our bodies because then, we actually feel what is going on and what happens to us. A lot of people do not like to feel. Culturally, we are fed that we have mind over matter all the time and that we should be disconnected and that we should just be in our heads about things.
And that’s not actually where – there’s so much wisdom in the body and we’re not tapping into that. It’s important to get into the body, so that we could be a full system, or a full –
[0:35:35.6] AMY MOORE: So much stored in the body.
[0:35:37.5] ERIN LINEHAN: So much stored. Yeah.
[0:35:38.6] AMY MOORE: It seems like too, that if you don’t move it out, by moving then you get –
[0:35:45.2] ERIN LINEHAN: I mean, there’s some theories and I don’t know if you saw that documentary on Netflix, called Heal, but that was just talking about how emotions can get stuck in the body and people have all sorts of varying opinions on this, but people, they don’t deal with things.
Sometimes, people think autoimmune stuff is largely caused by unresolved trauma. I remember when I was doing my Healing Touch apprenticeship, there’s this woman who was big on this, called Louise Hay. She wrote this book Heal Your Body. You’d look at all these – I might have talked about this before. My calf injury, I talked about this?
[0:36:17.7] AMY MOORE: I don’t think so. No.
[0:36:19.9] ERIN LINEHAN: I had this calf injury –
[0:36:22.2] ANNA NEWELL JONES: Some other podcast.
[0:36:25.3] ERIN LINEHAN: Yeah, so popular. I had this nagging injury in my calf and I’m like, “This is so annoying.” I couldn’t run and I was getting pissed. It had been going on and off for a month. I’m just like, “I don’t understand what’s going on.” I knew wasn’t physiological, because it would go away and then it would come back. I’m like, “What’s going on?”
Then, finally a month later, I had a friend come to visit. I was telling her about the apprenticeship. She’s like, “Oh, I love that book.” She was talking about Louise Hay. She was like, “Let’s look up lower body, or lower leg stuff.” It was all about moving forward. In this time period, I was taking this marketing class and I had to do –
[0:36:59.2] AMY MOORE: Oh, your favorite.
[0:37:01.0] ERIN LINEHAN: I know. I had to do this video about why I do my work. I was putting that off, because it was super vulnerable, I had to put myself out there. That and then I always had – to make another personal decision where I was like, I’m not going to do this or I’m not going to do this. Then I made that and I’m not even – this is not shitting you. It just –
[0:37:18.1] AMY MOORE: Went away?
[0:37:18.6] ERIN LINEHAN: Yes.
[0:37:19.6] AMY MOORE: Whoa.
[0:37:20.9] ANNA NEWELL JONES: Crazy.
[0:37:21.5] AMY MOORE: That’s cool.
[0:37:22.7] ERIN LINEHAN: I think that stuff happens often, and so people will come in and there’s all sorts of things. I think there’s a lot to that. People are scared of it, I think a lot of the time.
[0:37:33.6] ANNA NEWELL JONES: Well, we don’t talk about it.
[0:37:34.2] AMY MOORE: Because it sucks to feel it.
[0:37:35.0] ERIN LINEHAN: Of course.
[0:37:37.1] AMY MOORE: It’s like — yeah.
[0:37:39.0] ERIN LINEHAN: How do you feel about that, Amy?
[0:37:43.4] AMY MOORE: You have a good tip about your right hand.
[0:37:46.1] ERIN LINEHAN: Yeah. You can take, or your one hand.
[0:37:48.4] ANNA NEWELL JONES: I feel like we learned about this in coffee.
[0:37:51.0] AMY MOORE: We did. For sure.
[0:37:52.5] ERIN LINEHAN: Someone was upset some morning and I was like, “Okay, here we go.”
[0:37:55.9] AMY MOORE: Probably just me.
[0:37:57.7] ERIN LINEHAN: We’re going to take –
[0:37:58.5] ANNA NEWELL JONES: Someone else. Not looking at you two. Erin sits across from Amy and I. Someone. I’m not naming names.
[0:38:06.6] ERIN LINEHAN: That’s right. Now there’s only two other people in this room, right? If you put your feet on the floor –
[0:38:13.1] AMY MOORE: Oh, we got to do it. We’re all doing this right now.
[0:38:15.1] ANNA NEWELL JONES: We’re all doing it.
[0:38:16.0] AMY MOORE: Everyone, join us.
[0:38:16.8] ERIN LINEHAN: I like my left hand on my heart, but some people like their right hand, so you figure out what feels good. Then one hand on your belly, right? If you breathe all the way into your hips, but sometimes it’s hard to get air in there, that is energetically the root chakra, so that’s the bottom of your tailbone is the energetic seat of safety in your body.
If you can breathe all the way in there, then that’s the language that your nervous system knows is breath, right? If we breathe in and then breathe out, you can close your eyes. Amy was staring at me real intently, so we had to have that queue in. Amy, close those eyes. That was real intense.
[0:38:59.8] ANNA NEWELL JONES: Amy.
[0:39:03.5] ERIN LINEHAN: Anyhow. Okay.
[0:39:07.0] ANNA NEWELL JONES: Close your eyes. Okay, feet on the ground.
[0:39:09.4] ERIN LINEHAN: Feet on the ground and then just breathe in, so you can take three deep breaths and focus on your exhale, because that will bring you down. Yeah, there you go.
[0:39:21.5] AMY MOORE: It’s good.
[0:39:22.2] ERIN LINEHAN: It’s good.
[0:39:23.4] ANNA NEWELL JONES: Okay, so when would someone want to use this?
[0:39:25.0] ERIN LINEHAN: When they’re feeling super overwhelmed, or they just need to connect back in. If they feel scattered, or unfocused, or all over the place, or they really are –
[0:39:33.3] AMY MOORE: Anxious.
[0:39:34.0] ERIN LINEHAN: Anxious, or they’re hating themselves, sometimes it’s real helpful if you just do that and just take a few breaths. You can do that –
[0:39:41.4] AMY MOORE: Doesn’t that also have to do with your inner child type stuff?
[0:39:45.1] ERIN LINEHAN: Well, I mean, you can imagine, because if a lot of times when we are – will get in the therapy stuff, but a lot of times when we’re really upset, then that’s a little part of ourselves.
Our adult self and our capital S self is in control, but then when we get really triggered and then we’re acting out of those places, they’re a little parts of ourselves. You can imagine if you scooped up a kid that you can just pat them, right? You’re doing that to yourself. Does that make sense?
[0:40:09.1] AMY MOORE: Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
[0:40:11.1] ANNA NEWELL JONES: So good.
[0:40:11.6] AMY MOORE: Free therapy.
[0:40:14.1] ERIN LINEHAN: I can tell you also another one that you can do is if you put your hands on your face. I learned this from Tara Brach. She’s a meditation teacher and I listen to her podcast. Real good.
[0:40:22.1] ANNA NEWELL JONES: What’s it called?
[0:40:22.8] AMY MOORE: Tara Brach. We’ll look it up.
[0:40:23.9] ERIN LINEHAN: Tara Brach. Yeah. If you put your hands on your face and then if you’re real upset or something, it’s real triggered, and then so, “I see you, I love you, it’s okay. I’m not going to leave you.”
[0:40:35.1] AMY MOORE: You say it while your hand is on your face?
[0:40:36.3] ERIN LINEHAN: Yes. Like you’re speaking to yourself. As if you’re holding your own face. Like, “I see, I love you, I’m not going anywhere, I’m not going to leave. I don’t know how to do this, but I’ll figure it out.”
[0:40:50.0] ANNA NEWELL JONES: That’s good.
[0:40:50.4] AMY MOORE: So good.
[0:40:52.0] ANNA NEWELL JONES: That’s good.
[0:40:52.5] AMY MOORE: I’m going to be using all these tips a whole bunch in the next week.
[0:40:57.3] ERIN LINEHAN: Because sometimes we just need, in order to be in our bodies, we just need – anxiety is keeping us from drowning. We’re scared that we’re going to drown. Really, if we drop in and feel whatever it is that we need to feel, then – we might not feel awesome, right?
But we can handle it. Those two things; your hands on your heart and stomach and then your hands on your face, that just brings you into your own self, connects you into you.
[0:41:19.9] AMY MOORE: It’s interesting that in both those, you are literally – your hands are literally holding yourself.
[0:41:25.5] ERIN LINEHAN: Yes. Yup.
[0:41:26.6] AMY MOORE: Even that physical touch of just – That’s interesting. So thankful. Thank you. Thank you. That’s a good one, huh? Ready for this transition?
[0:41:39.4] ERIN LINEHAN: Anyhow goes, Amy.
[0:41:42.2] AMY MOORE: Just when you hold your face as if it’s a child, right? There’s a lot of things that we can actually do for kids to get them off on the right –
[0:41:52.4] ANNA NEWELL JONES: You’re good.
[0:41:53.8] AMY MOORE: Track.
[0:41:53.9] ERIN LINEHAN: You’re good. Well done.
[0:41:54.8] ANNA NEWELL JONES: Wow. That was a really –
[0:41:55.7] AMY MOORE: Thanks.
[0:41:57.3] ANNA NEWELL JONES: That’s an expert segue. Really impressed right now.
[0:42:01.6] AMY MOORE: One thing is why it is so important to teach body autonomy to kids. Their body is their own.
[0:42:11.4] ANNA NEWELL JONES: They’re the boss of their body.
[0:42:12.9] AMY MOORE: Yes, they’re the boss of their body. It’s so good. I do a lot of that stuff with my own kids, like body –
[0:42:18.8] ANNA NEWELL JONES: Yeah. I do it with Henry. Actually, I think you told me about Feather work hour. Is that her last name?
[0:42:27.3] AMY MOORE: Yes.
[0:42:27.5] ERIN LINEHAN: Is she local?
[0:42:28.8] ANNA NEWELL JONES: She is in Colorado. I think she’s in Boulder.
[0:42:30.5] AMY MOORE: Yes, she’s a local Colorado. Yes. she’s outside of Boulder. Maybe in Boulder. Feather.
[0:42:35.0] ANNA NEWELL JONES: She’s amazing.
[0:42:35.1] AMY MOORE: She’s amazing. She has a movement going in Colorado. I don’t know how much it’s gone to other states, but –
[0:42:43.6] ANNA NEWELL JONES: Well, she’s online.
[0:42:45.4] AMY MOORE: Yes. Her program is called Parenting Safe Children.
[0:42:49.1] ANNA NEWELL JONES: Wonderful, wonderful book. I’ve read it and I highly, highly recommend it every single caregiver.
[0:42:56.7] AMY MOORE: Caregiver in the world.
[0:42:58.6] ANNA NEWELL JONES: Parent.
[0:42:58.1] AMY MOORE: Anybody who works with kids.
[0:42:59.5] ANNA NEWELL JONES: Anyone.
[0:43:00.2] AMY MOORE: Yeah. Just to really help with kids understanding boundaries around their own bodies.
[0:43:05.7] ANNA NEWELL JONES: Yeah. To recognize troublesome behavior and how to prevent that.
[0:43:11.5] AMY MOORE: Yes, definitely, definitely. She has online workshops, in-person workshops. I went to an in-person workshop of hers. I just think it is so powerful for kids to feel that control of their own bodies. Then one of her big things is don’t ever force your kid to give someone a hug, even if it’s a grandma, or grandpa, or some –
[0:43:33.9] ANNA NEWELL JONES: Yeah, which can be super awkward and super hard to do that.
[0:43:38.0] AMY MOORE: What an important lesson that a kid could be like, “Well, I’ll give you a high-five instead.”
[0:43:41.7] ERIN LINEHAN: Consent is so big.
[0:43:43.3] AMY MOORE: Yeah. Yeah.
[0:43:44.4] ERIN LINEHAN: Important. It’s not taught enough, and so this is –
[0:43:47.5] AMY MOORE: No. You can empower your kid at such a young age to really understand that like, “Hey, you don’t want to give them a hug, give them a high-five instead, or whatever.”
[0:43:57.1] ERIN LINEHAN: Or E.T. phone home.
[0:43:59.5] ANNA NEWELL JONES: Or nothing. Or just say, “Hey, see you.” It’s hard. I feel we should say a quick tip on how to do that with grandparents, or people that it might feel awkward with to have that conversation with is to say, “This is what we’re working on and this is how you can be part of our team to empower Johnny, or whoever the kid is to be the boss of their body and have this body and autonomy.”
“Ultimately, it will keep them safe and set them up down the road for having a healthier relationship with their own bodies, and understanding consent for” – I mean, we could get off on so many different topics on this. I feel we have to keep relevant, but –
[0:44:33.9] AMY MOORE: I will say, so Feather also has conversation starter cards with those caregivers or with those family members or whomever you might want to have that type of conversation, she has tons of tools on her website to help support what could be a really hard conversation.
[0:44:53.0] ANNA NEWELL JONES: Yeah, exactly. You were saying how consent helps, or how this topic –
[0:44:58.6] ERIN LINEHAN: Well, I think when you teach your kids about where their boundaries are with their body and then teach them body autonomy stuff, I think then as a kid, then that stays with people as an adult. I don’t think consent for lots of things is not really taught, as much as it should be. It needs to be, because there’s so much issue with it in society.
[0:45:23.6] AMY MOORE: From food to consent.
[0:45:26.1] ANNA NEWELL JONES: Well, I mean, it’s –
[0:45:26.5] ERIN LINEHAN: Whole range. It’s everything about that.
[0:45:28.3] ANNA NEWELL JONES: It’s the whole body. I mean, yeah, anything with the physical body. I mean, yeah, we could –
[0:45:31.5] ERIN LINEHAN: How about aging?
[0:45:32.9] AMY MOORE: Oh, my gosh. Let’s do it.
[0:45:34.9] ERIN LINEHAN: I make this joke all the time that well, I don’t really have –
[0:45:40.5] AMY MOORE: The question is Erin, how do you feel about aging?
[0:45:44.1] ERIN LINEHAN: I make this joke all the time that people have issues with getting older, because they were super attractive when they were younger and I don’t care about it, because I was never that hot in the first place. If people always feel the need to be like, “No, no, no, no.” I’m like, “No, I really believe that.”
It’s not like I think that I’m hideous. I looked like this when I was 18-years-old and I look older now, because I have wrinkles, but then, I don’t care. I’m more comfortable in that and it’s not an insecurity. I’m not saying this to be validated. That is a true statement. I don’t give a fuck, because I wasn’t that hot in the first place. Sorry for all you people that were hot.
[0:46:25.6] AMY MOORE: Aging, bring it on.
[0:46:27.2] ERIN LINEHAN: Yeah, bring it on. I’m not as dumb as I used to be. That’s what I think about aging. Thank guys. That is dumb shit before.
[0:46:35.0] AMY MOORE: I don’t really have a big deal with aging. I really liked turning 40 and now I’m 41 and I really feel I welcomed 40 with wide open arms. I think it has a lot to do with just personal growth and personal work that I’ve done probably in my 30s, to get me to where I am now. Yes, honestly I feel grateful to be older.
[0:47:04.8] ANNA NEWELL JONES: I always feel it’s hard. I used to be hot. Erin left out the part that she’s usually telling me that. I’m like, “Uh, I love Botox.” I’m like, “Oh, give me all the Botox. Give me all the Botox. Thank you very much.”
Yeah, it’s hard getting older. My physical body changing and being like, “Uh, I used to be kinda hot. Now not so much.” I don’t feel that – just people’s reaction to you too is really different.
[0:47:40.7] ERIN LINEHAN: Or it’s the same.
[0:47:44.5] ANNA NEWELL JONES: Yeah. I feel super grateful to have the honor of aging. When I’m in a good place with it, that’s where I come at it from, because I had this hairstylist that was wonderful and she died from cancer. I’m like, she would love to be alive right now. It happened and a year later, she was gone.
I think about her a lot and how she would do anything. I’m sure to be here right now and so many people. To be able to get to age, to feel bad about myself — just kidding. To just experience life and all of its ups and downs, that is really, truly such an honor to be able to be present for my son.
[0:48:27.1] ERIN LINEHAN: That’s partially why I feel the need to take such good care of what I eat and how I move, because I want a good quality. I mean, obviously if I get some illness or whatever, that you can’t – but the things that I can control, then that’s what I want to be able to do that.
Having the quality of life that I want as I age, that your brain is still intact, but I can still move my body like that. Because when I was in grad school, we did – I took a family therapy. Well, that was one of my classes, and so we did a genogram, which is just the map of the family. One of the things I realized was that everybody in my family that has died before me had heart disease and something else.
[0:49:08.6] ANNA NEWELL JONES: Oh, that’s interesting.
[0:49:09.7] AMY MOORE: Yes.
[0:49:10.5] ERIN LINEHAN: My grandfather has now died and I don’t think that he had heart disease, but I could be wrong. Anyways, but realizing in that. Then I saw that Forks Over Knives documentary and I was like, “Oh, I can prevent – I can do something about this and I’m not going to have –” Then that’s why I mostly eat like that, because my cholesterol was high when I was younger and I’m like not. Then we could do something. It’s great. I think that’s also about aging stuff.
[0:49:37.9] ANNA NEWELL JONES: Yeah. I really wish I would’ve not been so into the tanning beds in high school.
[0:49:45.6] ERIN LINEHAN: We lived a really different life.
[0:49:47.2] ANNA NEWELL JONES: Oh, man. That was bad.
[0:49:48.4] ERIN LINEHAN: We really lived a really different life.
[0:49:49.6] ANNA NEWELL JONES: Baby oils. We lived a different life.
[0:49:52.2] ERIN LINEHAN: We lived a very different life.
[0:49:55.8] AMY MOORE: That is hilarious.
[0:49:56.5] ANNA NEWELL JONES: Here we are, we’ve come together.
[0:49:59.3] AMY MOORE: Podcasting. I do have to say. There was one of the females in my family really does not like aging. Won’t say her age, won’t – really just not into it. Doesn’t want to celebrate birthday.
[0:50:18.1] ERIN LINEHAN: I have a friend like that too and I just don’t get it.
[0:50:20.1] AMY MOORE: I don’t either.
[0:50:20.7] ERIN LINEHAN: I make sure to send a unicorn with a song on the birthday though, for sure.
[0:50:24.0] AMY MOORE: I bet you do. Oh, yeah. You do.
[0:50:25.3] ANNA NEWELL JONES: Tell us what the unicorn song is.
[0:50:27.5] ERIN LINEHAN: It’s just happy birthday.
[0:50:29.7] AMY MOORE: With the unicorn face.
[0:50:31.4] ANNA NEWELL JONES: Well, I know, but tell the listeners.
[0:50:32.5] ERIN LINEHAN: I’m like, you know what that is.
[0:50:34.4] ANNA NEWELL JONES: Yeah. I’m like, come on, they don’t know.
[0:50:41.2] AMY MOORE: Anamojis.
[0:50:42.1] ERIN LINEHAN: Anamoji and you can sing in to this thing.
[0:50:44.7] AMY MOORE: Erin’s favorite is the unicorn.
[0:50:46.2] ERIN LINEHAN: The unicorn is my favorite thing.
[0:50:48.3] ERIN LINEHAN: Or the chicken for my sister. My sister loved giraffes growing up and she is now – she’s doing the giraffe, talking really slow and it makes me laugh so hard. If you want to make me laugh send those things, because I love them.
[0:51:02.2] AMY MOORE: That’s awesome.
[0:51:03.2] ERIN LINEHAN: Makes me happy. That’s the good thing about technology.
[0:51:04.7] AMY MOORE: It will help you age well. Laugh.
[0:51:06.2] ERIN LINEHAN: Laugh.
[0:51:07.8] ANNA NEWELL JONES: Yes.
[0:51:07.9] AMY MOORE: Right? All right, with that –
[0:51:10.6] ANNA NEWELL JONES: Wait, we have some practical tips. Sunscreen. Wear sunscreen, water first thing in the morning and wear your bra to bed. Those are my –
[0:51:18.9] ERIN LINEHAN: Why do you wear a bra –
[0:51:20.3] AMY MOORE: Those are Anna’s practical tips, first of all.
[0:51:22.6] ERIN LINEHAN: I’ve never worn a bra to bed in my life.
[0:51:24.3] AMY MOORE: No. No. I’m not going to start.
[0:51:26.2] ERIN LINEHAN: I don’t use sunscreen sometimes, because I need some vitamin D. I wear a hat outside instead. A bra to bed. Don’t tell people that. It’s like, my favorite part of the day.
[0:51:40.3] ANNA NEWELL JONES: Sports bra. A large sports bra.
[0:51:42.7] AMY MOORE: No. No.
[0:51:44.8] ANNA NEWELL JONES: Okay. I’ve got some amazing boobs because of this.
[0:51:46.5] AMY MOORE: No.
[0:51:47.2] ANNA NEWELL JONES: I do.
[0:51:48.0] ERIN LINEHAN: You don’t sleep with your something anymore do you?
[0:51:49.5] ANNA NEWELL JONES: I do.
[0:51:50.4] ERIN LINEHAN: You do.
[0:51:51.6] ANNA NEWELL JONES: I was trying not to.
[0:51:52.3] ERIN LINEHAN: There was the phase of trying not to.
[0:51:55.0] ANNA NEWELL JONES: I am a very ambitious –
[0:51:55.7] AMY MOORE: You have a silk pillowcase.
[0:51:56.8] ANNA NEWELL JONES: I do have one of those. I’m a very ambitious back sleeper wanna be, but I struggle with it.
[0:52:03.6] AMY MOORE: I say, no thanks face down. Smashing it in the pillow.
[0:52:09.2] ANNA NEWELL JONES: That’s how I do.
[0:52:09.9] AMY MOORE: You should see how I wake up in the morning.
[0:52:12.7] ERIN LINEHAN: Like crease marks on the face?
[0:52:14.5] AMY MOORE: Oh, yeah.
[0:52:15.1] ERIN LINEHAN: Sports bra. Tell us about that.
[0:52:16.6] ANNA NEWELL JONES: Okay, so I started wearing a sports bra to bed when I was in middle school, when I first got my little boobies. I’ve worn a sports worn a sports bra – they’re looking at me like, “What are you doing?” I’m just keeping it real.
[0:52:32.7] AMY MOORE: You are.
[0:52:34.2] ERIN LINEHAN: You should see her off air.
[0:52:37.1] ANNA NEWELL JONES: This is me filtered.
[0:52:37.6] ERIN LINEHAN: I know.
[0:52:40.5] ANNA NEWELL JONES: Yeah, so I’ve worn a sports bra to bed since middle school and now I’m –
[0:52:44.6] ERIN LINEHAN: When Anna told us that, before we were like, “What’s this thing about sports bras?” Anna was like, “Yeah, since middle school.” Amy and I were like, “What?” Who does that? Who does that?
[0:52:54.8] ANNA NEWELL JONES: I thought everybody did that.
[0:52:55.6] ERIN LINEHAN: No one does it. Well, I can’t say no one.
[0:52:59.2] ANNA NEWELL JONES: If anybody wears their sports bra to bed – I like the ones that are stretched out, so they’re a little more comfortable. No, my boobs look amazing.
[0:53:07.7] AMY MOORE: All right, everybody. We are leaving you with our nugget, or awareness nugget.
[0:53:13.2] ERIN LINEHAN: Awareness nugget.
[0:53:13.5] AMY MOORE: Awareness challenge, or whatever you want to call it. That is to try the hand-to-heart, hand-to-belly when you find yourself in an agitated, or the hands on the face. Try that. Try either of those, if you find yourself agitated, anxious.
[0:53:32.9] ERIN LINEHAN: Sometimes when I go to bed and I have had a lot of stuff go through my head and I’ve finally stopped for the day and I lay down and that’s what I do and I’ll take several deep breaths just to arrive into sleep. That’s what works for me.
[0:53:46.2] AMY MOORE: That’s good. That’s the nugget. That’s it for the week.
[0:53:48.4] ANNA NEWELL JONES: Yeah, that’s great.
[0:53:49.7] AMY MOORE: All right, everybody. Don’t forget to go to lessalonepodcast.com to access the show notes, links and resources from this episode. Also, get 20% off at your spendingfastbootcamp.com through the link that will be in our show notes.
[0:54:06.4] ANNA NEWELL JONES: Yeah.
[0:54:07.0] AMY MOORE: That’s it.
[0:54:07.9] ERIN LINEHAN: That’s it. Thanks everybody.
[0:54:09.0] AMY MOORE: Bye-bye.
[0:54:09.4] ANNA NEWELL JONES: Bye.
[END OF EPISODE]
[0:54:14.3] AMY MOORE: Thanks for listening. You can find more about this episode and a way to connect to the community at lessalonepodcast.com. If you like us, don’t forget to subscribe and be sure to leave a review. It helps other people find us and could be just what they need.